set the world ablaze.

i’ve put this off for far too long, not really sure why. maybe a little hesitant because it’s not wrapped up with a pretty (& neutral, obviously) bow, or because i refuse to put myself in a bucket or because i can’t just pin down the one thing i’m best in the world at (because, truthfully, i know that there are a million things.) so many things that i look back on with pride; so many things that i know my people (and that’s anyone i’ve crossed paths with at some point in my life) have been touched, moved or inspired by; so many ideas that i’ve cultivated that bring people together or projects i’ve created that sparkle; so many intimate + personal conversations and group + grand discussions i’ve led that have disrupted.

i’m a generalist of trades.

an aries, so i can’t help but do all of them with passion; with an eagerness to learn, a determination to blaze trails and set the world on fire.

so, i’m available.

for consulting.

for connection.

for collaboration.

for creating containers for people to discover and create magic.

for making spaces that shift our communities and change the world.

i’m not exactly sure what this looks like, but i do know that you and i, we can build things together that we’ll be proud of, that don’t already exist, that light our souls on fire.

if you’re down for any or all of that, i’m ready.

vbrnt wrkshp is back.

let’s work together.

somehow.

some way.

t w e n t y e i g h t e e n

t w e n t y e i g h t e e n |

i was telling my bff a couple of weeks ago that i needed some time to get my bearings this year. that i felt like 2018 was hurled at me, even though i was ready for 2017 to be over. the last year brought tons of change, something that i love + crave, but a lot of the change was hard. it made me uncomfortable, made me cling to the vision of what i wanted, what i needed to thrive, yet it pushed me further and further away from that life.

i don't have a routine. i don't have rituals. i've never felt the need for them. so, here i am, 3 days into the second month of the year, reigniting something that i've been thinking about since i last wrote, but not realizing it was something that i actually needed until about 20 minutes ago.

33 days into 2018, i'm starting to feel grounded, clear and ready for the next 332 days of this year.

here i go.

fall: the wishlist.

currently swooning over...

bag // hat // dress // sweater

necklace // rose gold ring // stud // sneakers

 boyfriends // booties // heels // leggings // shirt // classics

hello, fall.

while today is not the official first day of fall, i'm just going to say 'EFF IT' and embrace this beautiful, comforting change in seasons. i'm ready to start piling up the layers, drinking hot tea, wearing little booties and rocking big, loose sweaters.

i am ready for fall.

[contrary to what this post from only a few weeks ago implied.]

fall is so many things, and honestly, i think i write something about fall every year. my love for this season, the football sundays, the crockpot meals, the soup on the stove, the okay to eat an entire bag of candy corn in-season [because, frankly, this is the only time of year it is okay to eat candy corn. and it better be brach's because there is no other option,] the crispness in the air, oh the crispness.

i am craving what the crisp fall air does for me: it cleanses me; it brings me energy; it gives me perspective; it reminds me to slow down and approach things with more vigor, more energy; it gives me space to b r e a t h e.

so, hello fall, i welcome you with wide-open arms - i am so ready for you.

image via hplyrikz.

today's gentle reminder:

raising a loving, kind, gentle, passionate, tender, strong, vivacious human being takes time, hard work and too many deep breaths to count.

'...a moment of patience in a moment of anger saves you a hundred moments of regret.'

the pinstagram life.

[i don't want a pinterest home]

i want a beautiful home. a comfortable home. a vibrant home, full of love, light, laughter and the pitter patter of kids' feet. i want a home that gives me peace of mind. that is a reflection of our personalities. a home that is well-loved and one i take pride in.

[i don't want to be a pinterest mom.] 

i want to be an involved mom. i want to be a mom who makes cupcones for her little's birthdays. i want to make the cool halloween costumes [even with my disdain for halloween.] i want to display kid artwork all around our home. i want to show our kids how much they're loved, in all of the different ways possible.

[i don't want pinterest style.] 

i want comfort in my own skin. i want style that enhances my confidence and makes me feel sexy. i want style that is timeless, that I'll be rocking in 10, 20, 30 years. i want style that evolves as i evolve.

what you share with the world is beauty through your eyes. what you find beautiful in the world is beautiful in your eyes. how you show love, how you express yourself, how you indulge is all about you.

hat if every one of us started pinning, instagramming, sharing on your timeline only the things that spoke to us and not the things we thought would get the most likes? would the world have a better understanding of who we really are?

keeping this in mind as i sit on this side of my screen.

monday//life-lately.

it seems that these kinds of posts come more frequently than i'd like - the ones where i apologize (mostly to myself) about not writing more frequently, about not giving myself the time to sit down and do what lights me up, about doing this or that before something else. honestly, it's because they do happen pretty frequently; this time, i don't feel so guilty. or at least i'm not going to dwell on it.

it is what it is.

yes, it has been a while since i last sat down with the intention of reflection. that's what my writing is, after all - a chance for me to connect to and reflect on all of life's happenings, the pretty things i see, the times i forget to pay attention to myself and let life take control., anything and everything i'm loving at the moment.

i guess that's what i've been doing for the last few months.

that, and daydreaming.

• i celebrated my 30th birthday in a few of the best ways possible:
  • a night on the town in nyc with some of my closest friends.
  • a romantic dinner (sans little one!) at arguably one of the best restaurants in nyc with my handsome mister.
  • brunch at our favorite lower east side restaurant with one of my best friends and her lovely (and bonkosi-approved) suitor.
• i've lost track of my yoga mat. and i mean this in the philosophical sense. [and have since found it again, thanks to this guy.]
• i've forgotten which programs i use to blog. no, really.
• i've talked to my best friend every week. it's felt good to just pick up the phone.
• i've thought about a new yoga teacher training, reading books, writing and learning something new.
• i got pregnant.
• i started a baby registry.
• we spent a few quiet days at the beach on the outer banks.
• i've dreamt of traveling, long distances, short ones, different countries, back home, my mister and rambunctious toddler right by my side. i've dreamt of this daily.
• i've thought about selling most of our belongings to live a more simple life...and afford ourselves the ability to travel to destinations near and far.

mostly, though, i've been living, breathing it all in.

hey monday!

today felt different.

it's not like i woke up this morning and gave myself a much-needed pep talk - you know, the whole 'today is a new day...do something great' sort of talks. i definitely didn't do that.

instead, i woke up lazily [note: slowly would be too graceful a word to use in this instance], with a sick, feverish little one and a drowsy husband next to me. we woke up with our phones in-hand, a terrible habit i so desperately want to get out of, deciding to keep our little home from school, which in turn would keep me home from my freelance work.

after re-reading that paragraph, i'm not sure how today was any different than every other gloomy monday i've felt not-so-motivated. the last few mondays (and to be honest, most days of the last couple of months), i've felt under-motivated. and even that may be an understatement.

but again, i said today felt different.

it was beautiful outside. honestly, absolutely beautiful. the sun was shining, there was something spring-like in the air...and that puts a little pep in my step. oh, and today was week 12 of my second pregnancy. which means the dreaded first trimester is over...and i think my body felt it (quite literally.) my perspective shifted, my energy levels, which had been building over just the last couple of days, finally got me off of my couch for more than an hour.

WIN!

i mean, i was still in my just-rolled-out-of-bed-find-something-quick clothes from this morning at 4p this afternoon, but my nails were painted...and not just my toes or my fingers. BOTH sets of extremities were painted, with topcoat.

this was huge. how huge? not only were my nails painted, i also showered and shaved my legs, i was excited to write, and i committed to getting our little one back into a bedtime routine (to hopefully rid him of his night terrors.) oh, and those piles of unfolded clean laundry lying in all corners of our home that i've grown to have a strong disdain for - they got touched - folded and put away.

today, felt different.

today was the day that i committed to loving on myself a little bit more so i can love on family and friends a little bit harder, a little bit longer and not feel sucked dry by the time i get into bed.

today, i felt powerful, inspired, committed to taking control of my circumstances and stop living vicariously through the people who inspire me on instagram or the pretty radical group of women i'm connected to through a facebook group.

some days are harder than others to feel like this, but yet again, i did say that today felt different.